10 GUIDELINES FOR GETTING ALONG
1. Listen: Better to say less than you think especially if you are thinking negative.
2. Develop a slow, low, persuasive voice. It is how you say it that counts more than what you say.
3. Never make a promise you can’t or you don’t intend to keep. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Integrity counts.
4. Be interested in others, show empathy and show regard of what others say and validate their pain.
5. Be cheerful and don’t dwell on the negative or the burdens of others
6. Take opportunities to say kind and encouraging words to and about others. Avoid gossip.
7. Let your actions speak about who you are rather than you words
8. Use wit and humor freely, but not at the expense of others.
9. Pay no attention to derogatory and negative remarks about you. Live so that no one will believe the person
10. Be NICE Use positive statement such as thank you, please, you are welcome.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Story of the pickle jar
LIFE LESSONS AND THE STORY OF THE PICKLE JAR
Children learn by what you do not by what you say and the story of the Pickle Jar is a wonderful example of how a parent taught his son many of life's lessons.
The pickle Jar as far back as I can remember sat on the floor beside the dresser in my parent's bedroom. When he got ready for bed, Dad would empty his pockets and toss his coins into the jar. As a small boy, I was always fascinated at the sounds the coins made as they were dropped into the jar. They landed with a merry jingle when the jar was almost empty. Then the tones gradually muted to a dull thud as the jar was filled.
I used to squat on the floor in front of the jar to admire the copper and silver circles that glinted like a pirate's treasure when the sun poured through the bedroom window. When the jar was filled, Dad would site at the kitchen table and roll the coins before taking them to the bank. Taking the coins to the bank was always a big production. Stacked neatly in a small cardboard box, the coins were placed between Dad and me on the seat of his old truck.
Each and every time, as we drove to the bank, Dad would look at me hopefully. "These coins are going to keep you out of the textile mill, son. You're going to do better than me. This old mill town's not going to hold you back". Also, each time, as he slid the box of rolled coins across the counter at the bank toward the cashier, he would grin proudly. "These are for my son's college fund. He'll never work at the mill all his life like me".
We would always celebrate each deposit by stopping for an ice cream cone. I would always get chocolate. Dad would always get vanilla. When the clerk at the ice cream parlor handed Dad his change, he would show me the few coins nestled in his palm. "When we get home, we'll start filling the jar again." He always let me drop the first coins into the empty jar. As they rattled around with a brief, happy jingle, we ginned at each other. "You'll get to college on pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters." he said. "But you'll get there, I'll see to that."
No matter how rough things got at home, Dad continued to doggedly drop his coins into the jar. Even the summer when Dad got laid off from the mill, and Mama had to serve dried beans sever times a week, not a single dime was taken from the jar. To the contrary, as Dad looked across the table at me, pouring catsup over my beans to make them more palatable, he became more determined than ever to make a way out for me, "When you finish college, Son", he told me, his eyes glistening, "You'll never have to eat beans again-unless you want to."
The years passed, and I finished college and took a job in another town. Once, while visiting my parents, I used the phone in their bedroom and noticed that the pickle jar was gone. It had served its purpose and had been removed. A lump rose in my throat as I stared at the spot beside the dresser where the jar had always stood. My Dad was a man of few words; He never lectured me on the values of determination, perseverance, and faith. The pickle jar had taught me all these virtues far more eloquently than the most flowery of words could have done. When I married, I told my wife Susan about the significant part the lowly pickle jar had played in my life as a boy. In my mind, it defined, more than anything else, how much my Dad loved me.
The first Christmas after our daughter jessica was born, we spend the holiday with my parents. After dinner, Mom and Dad sat next to each other on the sofa, taking turns cuddling their first grandchild. Jessica began to whimper softly, and Susan took her from Dad's arms. "She probably needs to be changed," she said, carrying the baby into my parent's bedroom to diaper her. When Susan came back into the living room, there was a strange mist in her eyes.
She handed Jessica back to Dad before taking my hand and leading me into the room. "Look, "she said softly, her eyes directly me to a spot on the floor beside the dresser. To my amazement, there, as if it had never been removed stood the old pickle jar, the bottom already covered with coins. I walked over to the pickle jar, dug down into my pocket, and pulled out a fistful of coins. With a gamut of emotions choking me, I dropped the coins into the jar. I looked up and saw that Dad, carrying Jessica , had slipped quietly into the room. Our eyes locked, and I knew he was feeling the same emotions I felt. Neither one of us could speak.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life, for better or for worse. With your gestures and actions you can shape a child for the better or the worse.
Watch your children grow and they will teach you what you have taught them. www.facestkc.com
Children learn by what you do not by what you say and the story of the Pickle Jar is a wonderful example of how a parent taught his son many of life's lessons.
The pickle Jar as far back as I can remember sat on the floor beside the dresser in my parent's bedroom. When he got ready for bed, Dad would empty his pockets and toss his coins into the jar. As a small boy, I was always fascinated at the sounds the coins made as they were dropped into the jar. They landed with a merry jingle when the jar was almost empty. Then the tones gradually muted to a dull thud as the jar was filled.
I used to squat on the floor in front of the jar to admire the copper and silver circles that glinted like a pirate's treasure when the sun poured through the bedroom window. When the jar was filled, Dad would site at the kitchen table and roll the coins before taking them to the bank. Taking the coins to the bank was always a big production. Stacked neatly in a small cardboard box, the coins were placed between Dad and me on the seat of his old truck.
Each and every time, as we drove to the bank, Dad would look at me hopefully. "These coins are going to keep you out of the textile mill, son. You're going to do better than me. This old mill town's not going to hold you back". Also, each time, as he slid the box of rolled coins across the counter at the bank toward the cashier, he would grin proudly. "These are for my son's college fund. He'll never work at the mill all his life like me".
We would always celebrate each deposit by stopping for an ice cream cone. I would always get chocolate. Dad would always get vanilla. When the clerk at the ice cream parlor handed Dad his change, he would show me the few coins nestled in his palm. "When we get home, we'll start filling the jar again." He always let me drop the first coins into the empty jar. As they rattled around with a brief, happy jingle, we ginned at each other. "You'll get to college on pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters." he said. "But you'll get there, I'll see to that."
No matter how rough things got at home, Dad continued to doggedly drop his coins into the jar. Even the summer when Dad got laid off from the mill, and Mama had to serve dried beans sever times a week, not a single dime was taken from the jar. To the contrary, as Dad looked across the table at me, pouring catsup over my beans to make them more palatable, he became more determined than ever to make a way out for me, "When you finish college, Son", he told me, his eyes glistening, "You'll never have to eat beans again-unless you want to."
The years passed, and I finished college and took a job in another town. Once, while visiting my parents, I used the phone in their bedroom and noticed that the pickle jar was gone. It had served its purpose and had been removed. A lump rose in my throat as I stared at the spot beside the dresser where the jar had always stood. My Dad was a man of few words; He never lectured me on the values of determination, perseverance, and faith. The pickle jar had taught me all these virtues far more eloquently than the most flowery of words could have done. When I married, I told my wife Susan about the significant part the lowly pickle jar had played in my life as a boy. In my mind, it defined, more than anything else, how much my Dad loved me.
The first Christmas after our daughter jessica was born, we spend the holiday with my parents. After dinner, Mom and Dad sat next to each other on the sofa, taking turns cuddling their first grandchild. Jessica began to whimper softly, and Susan took her from Dad's arms. "She probably needs to be changed," she said, carrying the baby into my parent's bedroom to diaper her. When Susan came back into the living room, there was a strange mist in her eyes.
She handed Jessica back to Dad before taking my hand and leading me into the room. "Look, "she said softly, her eyes directly me to a spot on the floor beside the dresser. To my amazement, there, as if it had never been removed stood the old pickle jar, the bottom already covered with coins. I walked over to the pickle jar, dug down into my pocket, and pulled out a fistful of coins. With a gamut of emotions choking me, I dropped the coins into the jar. I looked up and saw that Dad, carrying Jessica , had slipped quietly into the room. Our eyes locked, and I knew he was feeling the same emotions I felt. Neither one of us could speak.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life, for better or for worse. With your gestures and actions you can shape a child for the better or the worse.
Watch your children grow and they will teach you what you have taught them. www.facestkc.com
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