For simplicity purposes, child is used to refer to one or more children.
Effective communication is the foundation to a healthy relationship. A healthy relationship between parents is essential to the well-being of your child. A relationship can be defined as the connection, association or involvement between persons. This does not imply intimacy or personal closeness. Effective and healthy communication between parents is essential to the shared concern and love of your child. A child will learn the life skill of communication from role modeling after their parents’ communication. If you find you are in a relationship where there is dysfunctional communication, it is possible for one parent to communicate in a positive and healthy manner and disregard the negative, dysfunctional communication of the other. However, for the best interest of your child and to effectively co-parent; healthy communication is a two way street. The following are some simple guidelines.
- When speaking to the other parent, refer to the child as OUR child rather than, "my"child.
- Be ever present to your tone, facial expression and the use of your words towards one another. Keeping them respectful, kind and compassionate.
- When communicating with the other parent, start the conversation with a respectful greeting and with points the two of you agree upon before talking about ones you do not agree upon. End the conversation politely even if you are upset.
- Avoid negative, sarcastic, ridiculing, comments that invoke guilt, and/or foul language towards each other.
- Seek out solutions together by asking questions rather than debating, invalidating, criticizing, ridiculing, blaming and or dismissing the other person’s point of view.
- Make every effort to say what you mean and mean what you say and to have integrity to your communication regarding yourself and your child.
- Practice healthy exchange of information by not interrupting each other before the other parent’s point is made or information is shared.
- Be respectful towards one another by responding in a timely manner to requests/questions, phone calls, emails, text messages and provide appropriate and actuate information regarding you child.
- Strive always to make decisions based on what is in your child’s best interest rather than your best interest. Keep in mind your child has two parents and they need and love you both. It is mentally damaging for a child to suffer alienation from either parent. No matter the circumstances, every effort should be made to find a way for your child to have a healthy relationship with both parents with out feeling torn loyalties.
- Respect the differences in each other and each other’s parenting style. You may not agree but you can support, respect and/or cooperate with the other parent for your child’s best interest.
